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August 27, 2003
Futurama
I’ve wanted to have my palms read for ages. I don’t have any feeling that it tells my future, but I could find it shocking if it had any relationship to my actual life. In my preconceived notion of a palm reading, a mysterious woman who smells faintly of sandalwood takes my hand and slowly traces the lines along my palm. She looks up in amazement and tells me that she has no idea what my fortune is. The webs of my life crisscross erratically, my lifeline stops and starts in fits of pique, and fortune meanders randomly in minute oxbows and rivulets, overflowing their banks into my skin.
I just want someone to confirm how I’m feeling right now. Sometimes my future seems written in the stars, sometimes it seems my future is unwritten, sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night, terrified of dying and not affecting anything.
On the other hand, my Onion horoscope offers some comfort
:
Libra: (Sept. 23—Oct. 23)
You'll discover a great new diet that lets you eat whatever you want while ballooning up to 450 sexy, sexy pounds.
Posted by G at August 27, 2003 08:38 PM
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