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November 28, 2003
I've lost poor Tommy
I’m infamous for forgetting where I’ve placed things. Sometimes it takes me an extra ten minutes to get out the door because I’ll misplace my cap or my sunglasses. I haven’t worn any cologne in months, but I decided to put some onto my body before I left for Terry and Kathy’s place for Turkey Day. I’m a funky guy, but the guys that usually are attracted to me like me unscented. I’m fine with that, as perfumes and colognes usually irritate my allergies.
I know I own some. I bought cologne three years ago at an airport as I was leaving the country for some unknown destination. I had the girls working at the duty-free shop spray and sniff me. After sniffing me and various parts of my body, they decided I was a Tommy boy. I haven’t worn any in months, but decided to smell spicy for the turkey. Time to look for the Tommy bottle. Can’t find it. It’s not in the medicine cabinet, it’s not on my shelves, it’s not in the miscellaneous pile under my bed.
I had that crazy internal debate that I do occasionally. Do I waste time looking in strange places like the fridge, inside the alcohol globe, and inside the sock drawer for the cologne, or just give up? It is possible that one of the roommates borrowed it, used it up, etc. I doubt that, because I think Tommy is one of the ‘straight’ colognes. Texas Chris could have used it, but I think his skin is sensitive.
The most likely option is that I placed it somewhere truly random. Because I am obsessive once I can’t find something, I’ll be looking behind the dvd’s, under the circular saw, and near the dog food. I can honestly say that I can see a possible scenario from months ago: I’m late for a date, running around. I have the cologne in my hand, running towards my room. I realize I forgot to feed the dog, so I sidle towards the dog food before I forget. Dog feeding requires two hands, so I set the cologne down, feed the dog, re-realize I am late for the date, and dash off. I don’t remember doing this, but I can see it as a logical sequence of events in my own strange world.
Posted by G at November 28, 2003 05:07 PM
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Comments
You have a circular saw and a lesbian doppelganger? How lucky can one guy be? Have you checked near the door for the cologne? I tend to leave alot of things near the door. I forget that I'm holding things as I'm about to leave so there's tends to be a pile of random items on the shelf by the door. Look there first. If that doesn't work, follow the dog, they can track things like that well.
Posted by: Eric at November 29, 2003 01:54 AM
You know cologne goes bad like any other alcohol, right?
Posted by: sam at November 29, 2003 10:13 AM