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February 13, 2004
American Beauty, Pt. II: The Revenge
My daily walk to my school always involves interesting moments. The chicken heads erupting out of a plastic bag, the pile of dead rats on a rotted mattress, the 'dog crap' dance I dodge to the tune of music.
The moment in American Beauty with the small plastic bag drifting ever higher swirled into my reality this morning. One problem: in my reality, this is some filthy grimy tarp plastic approximately 15 feet long. The randomness of the American Beauty magical plastic bag prevented me from dodging its undulating tendrils. I stepped left, it switched directions to intercept. I dodged right, it dove towards me. I couldn't even shriek as the blasted thing wrapped its filthy crinkly arms around me. I was trapped like a dolphin in a vile tuna net, struggling helplessly against it.
The rest of the sidewalk is filled with students, parents, and bodega vendors. Through the blurry grimy perception of the plastic, I can see them staring at the strange math teacher doing a bizarre voodoo plastic dance. I wouldn't have helped me either.
Then I went in the school to teach. I'm really glad I have nine days off.
Posted by G at February 13, 2004 05:35 PM
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