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June 26, 2004

Snappy pictures of Cloville

I finally organized some photos of my trip back to Clovis. You can click here to look at photos, click on each pic to enlarge.

Going back to Clovis was just like revisiting all of my failures, all of the things that I hate about myself, and all of the things I want to forget. I felt so strange going to a place where Taco Box is a hangout with no ironic appellation, every church sign has some sexual connotation, my mom's funeral is surrounded by giant American flags and volcanoes, and mobile homes are quality living.

All of that is nicely mixed with good feelings- talking with my last girlfriend from high school, looking at how tall the trees grew that I planted in my mom's back garden, eating all sorts of amazing comfort foods, and laughing with my sisters and family.

I keep editing and deleting text to try to convey how I feel right now. Just like Clovis, I'm just too mixed up to produce anything coherent. It was a mighty good place to grow up, I never owned keys to the locks on our door, as it was never locked. It was also a racist/hyperconservative bible belt, athletics worshiping hell. It is a place I grew up, it is a place I fled from. Right now I'm fine/absolutely falling apart, laughing/weeping, and not exactly a place anyone in their right mind would want to visit unless you're friends or family. I'm definitely glad I've got friends and family, but I'm also glad I'm just staying at home with my dog.

Posted by G at June 26, 2004 08:06 PM

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Comments

Your hometown sounds alot like the one I grew up in and the one I live in now.

Posted by: myke at June 26, 2004 09:00 PM

Can we take you to lunch somewhere amusing in Manhattan? Weekdays are fine.

The church sign reminds me of one of Tammy Faye Starlite's songs, where she sings to gay men that "the only man should should go down on your knees for is Jesus."

http://www.tammyfayestarlite.com/

Posted by: barry at June 26, 2004 09:17 PM

The photos are so foreign to a foreigner--even a foreigner from a rural island like me, for whom America is nothing but big cities and big lights. Thanks for sharing. I remember all too well the feeling of going back home for a funeral.

Posted by: PatCH at June 26, 2004 09:59 PM

Lordy! Clovis reminds me of TooStoned in many ways (except all that flat land!) And that Trailer Church! I've never seen one! Although, I'm sure at least one is hauling itself somewhere around this state! My first thought was "First Trailer Trash Church of God".

BTW - I think you do look like yer dad!

Posted by: Lee at June 27, 2004 03:23 AM

Your web page is fascinating. Judging from your father's photograph, I must be about his age, perhaps older than he. I'm in my mid-sixties, married, father of three, grandfather of two. I lived in Lubbock, Texas, for 10 years 40 years ago. It is so strange to go back to the Bible Belt. I doubt my wife and I will be doing much of that any longer since her beloved mother passed away in West Texas. Every other radio station is Christian in format, religious symbols turn up in the strangest places. Many years ago my friend and I drove to the Texas/New Mexico state line, where a saloon on the New Mexico side was commonly known as "The Bloated Goat." Why? Christians objected to placement of the bar there and hung a sacrifical goat on a fence post, where it became swollen in the broiling sun and finally burst. When we arrived, we could see the remainder of the corpse hanging there. Please accept my deepest sympathy on the passing of your mother.

Posted by: Clint at June 27, 2004 10:31 AM

The New York Times just this week ran an excellent article on Fort Worth. I think that is where I saw it. It has a great summary of where to go and what to do, including the legendary Joe T. Garcia's for Mexican food and the three outstanding art museums: the Kimball, Modern Art Museum, and Amon Carter Museum of Art, all jewels. Every place you're visiting on your trip are "my old stompin' grounds," as they say in Texas.

Posted by: Clint at June 27, 2004 10:40 AM

Have to LOVE the Assembly of God Church sign. My AG church use to always put up "slogans for Jesus" like that. Love 'em. LOL

Posted by: mark at June 28, 2004 11:33 AM

I grew up with G and any failures he writes of were not apparent to me. But then again I didn't know the complexity of G's situation back then. I only knew the good times we had together and specifically at his house. It was at G's house I first saw "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" and where I first experienced the business end of a cattle prod. Where I learned how much fun the combination of a "booger ball" and ceiling fan can be... and how it can ruin a perfectly good latex paint job. It was at G's house I learned that sometimes it's justified to bring the garden hose into the house during a water fight.

G and I didn't always get along but I have only fond memories of growing up in Clovis with him. But if you do get on his bad side, expect late-night prank phone calls from cattle and assorted cow parts adorning your car the following morning. MOOOOOOO!

Posted by: pat at June 28, 2004 03:47 PM

Funny, I think I first saw "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" at G's house, too. I watched it again last night. G, you were the first person I knew who had an answering machine (wow) and I always knew you were destined for bigger things than Clovis. Not that it's all bad, but...it's mostly bad. Thanks for posting the pictures. Taco Box did have good tater tots, pumpkin-pie shakes, and vanilla Dr. Peppers, I have to admit.

I'm very happy you landed in NYC, even though we rarely get to see each other!

Posted by: Jen at June 28, 2004 04:12 PM

"It is a place I grew up, it is a place I fled from."

I feel the exact same way about my hometown. Amazing how many levels of feeling these places can touch. I wonder how we will feel about New York in 20 years?

Welcome back, Galicious!

Posted by: MzOuiser at June 29, 2004 01:44 PM

Yes, I hated it. I just want to say hi and sorry to hear about your mother. I did not know. Going back there myself in September and only because I do have family and I know I'm going to leave. Hope all is well for you.

Wanda Arevalo

Posted by: Wanda at July 13, 2004 11:04 AM