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January 21, 2007
The nose knows
Click to enlarge to see the shattered cartilage glory.
My built-in snorkeling equipment has never been right. First time I broke it was when I was playing kickball in the fourth grade. Scott Svatos and I were both outfield, and the ball was kicked high in the air. I raced. He raced. We both were looking up, smacked each other in the head, and I was knocked out cold. My time in middle school with thick glasses and no peripheral vision didn't help. I walked into many doors and walls, always with a resounding crack and slight shift to the cartilage.
The craziest was this time as an adult when a straight friend of mine started a fight in a bar. I was happily drinking my beer when I looked up just in time to see a fist heading to my face. My nose was squashed flat. I was covered in blood, we were all kicked out, and we limped back to his place. He sat me shirtless down in a chair, straddled my knee, and straightened it for me. It hurt like the bejeesus, but I was totally focused on his weight on my leg and his beat up face inches from mine.
I'm not sure what he would have done if I'd kissed him. It was one of those weird moments. In moments, there was a fresh flow of blood, and he jumped up and grabbed a towel. End of moment.
So I snore now. I can't really breathe out of the left nostril, and there are little shifty bits in my nose. Last summer I got to the point of scheduling surgery, but I canceled. They're not sure if it will fix my breathing passages, and it could make the structure weaker. The second worries me, as zod knows I'll NEVER walk into another door/another fist, right? Finally, I sometimes look in the mirror and have no idea who is looking back at me, so what's going to happen when I can't even recognize my own nose? Maybe snoring is okay.
Posted by G at January 21, 2007 02:54 PM
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Comments
That broken nose-straightening moment: strangely hot. Wonder what he'd've done if you'd smooched him... if all (straight) chicks are three shots away from lesbianism, perhaps all (straight) dudes are merely a bloody bar brawl away from, well, you know. (Chuckle!)
Posted by: goblinbox at January 21, 2007 04:52 PM
Despite having my own nose broken a couple of time (rugby, a MAN's sport), I can commiserate for a completely different reason. Thanks to a car accident a decade ago, I have a tear in the Labrum of my left shoulder.
There's no continuous pain thanks to my physio who said keeping the shoulder muscles strong will strengthen the joint and minimize "bone on bone scraping". Yuck.
I, too, spoke to a doctor who said:
"We'll go in with two scopes, find the tear and sew it up. Right now you have 90% movement. This may give you 93-95% but there's a chance you'll scar and drop as low as 70%"
Remember those Loony Tunes where the character ran off screen so fast they left a dust version of themselves?
That said - did the doctor give you any reason, other than cosmetic, for fixing it? Will the shifty bits shift more? If he (she?) is reasonable sure it'll be stable, maybe you should leave it.
You look gorgeous as is, darling. And snoring is just fine - you can always be found in pitch dark. HA!
Posted by: Jim (The Canuck One) at January 21, 2007 06:08 PM
Do you remember the Gilligan's Island episode where Gilligan was convinced he needed a nose job?
Posted by: homer at January 21, 2007 07:20 PM
Looks FAHNE to me!
Posted by: ted at January 21, 2007 07:54 PM
that is a damn good pic of you.
broken cartilage and all, you are still a hottie!
Posted by: jiminy at January 21, 2007 09:39 PM
Don't worry, you're still do-able. Bigtime.
Posted by: MikeProv1 at January 21, 2007 09:59 PM
I had a dream about you last night. When you get a chance, go read about it. http://retardedbutkindafunny.blogspot.com
Posted by: BJ at January 22, 2007 09:26 AM
No one would ever notice your nose if you didn't point it out to them. I, for one, am too busy looking at your sexy eyes, great smile, and finely refined facial hair.
Posted by: Scott at January 22, 2007 03:54 PM
It's a great nose -and a handsome face. Don't change it.
I never scheduled my surgery for my nose. My left nostril barely gets air, but screw it - I'll live.
Posted by: Blobby at January 22, 2007 05:11 PM
Don't you even THINK about it...!
Posted by: Todd HellsKitchen at January 22, 2007 06:58 PM
Delurking to say that some people have a *thing* for bent noses.
Also - so he sat you down shirtless, and straddled your knee . . . what happened next?! (Make something up.)
Posted by: Long Story Longer at January 23, 2007 11:09 AM
Funny...I never noticed that. Maybe because we're always side-by-side at a bar rather than face-to-face. Hmm...
Posted by: Stephen J. Xanthos at January 23, 2007 01:44 PM
It gives your nose a 'distinguished' and sexy look. Nobody likes someone who is 100% perfect. If that's your only fault...you should be good to go.
Posted by: Jeff at January 23, 2007 04:34 PM
OK, fess up. Who did the lighting for this pic?
Oh, sorry, we were supposed to be noticing the nose... Don't worry; It's ALL good.
Posted by: CHROME at January 24, 2007 12:00 AM
I won't try to convince you either way. It comes down to what makes you happy.
I have a deviated septum (spelling?) courtesy of my step mother at the age of 10 however, it is minor and I don't snore.
Btw, I like your nose the way it is.
Posted by: moby at January 24, 2007 12:27 AM
I got the surgery, and now I can breathe out of "both noses". I also had my sinus openings widened so that I am not as prone to sinus infections. I called the procedure "my inner nose job for inner beauty". Life has been much better since.
Posted by: mr pinky at January 24, 2007 03:42 PM
beautiful - don't change it, unless you stop breathing
Posted by: farmboyz at January 25, 2007 08:55 PM
Have you made a decision?
Posted by: Todd HellsKitchen at February 4, 2007 10:54 AM
Broke or no-broke, he's a handsome bloke.
p.s. you shoulda kissed your straight friend. You could've always just said you were drink and didn't know what you were doing. Don't they always say that?
Posted by: Robocub at February 12, 2007 01:48 PM